Month: August 2010

What’s This? A Music Post?

I can’t honestly say I’m a music critic. But I know a good music video when I see it.

Say hello to Forever Famicom… the movie.

Totally stolen artwork due to me be lazy and artistically retarded

Since I’m totally awful at talking about music I’mo keep this short.

Random (Mega Ran) makes all kinds of great rap music. He’s really a breath of fresh air these days. You should buy his stuff. He’s pretty damn awesome for someone who lives in Arizona.

Arizona is fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkked up. But that’s another conversation.

Also, right alongside him is the great K-Murdock… yeah boiiiiiiiiii. *ahem*.

Dunno if I’d call it nerdcore… but that’s why I’m not a damn music expert.

Just watch Chapter 1 and 2 and judge for yourself.

2nd Trip to Galloping Ghost. More impessions

I think I’m better able to speak about this place having been there a couple of times and seeing all there was to offer, I’m ready to talk a little bit more.

Yeah, it’s still pretty awesome.

For the 15 bucks I spend there… I can get pretty much all the gaming in a want/need. As opposed to Gameworks where that’d get me about an hour’s worth of games… if that.

But let’s get down to the nitty gritty.

My 2nd time in, I do what I always do. Spend the first 10 minutes walking in circles, trying to decide where to start my day. I saw they just got Shadowdancer up and running, spent the first 20 or so minutes there.

It’s strange, I’ve never felt so at ease in an arcade before. I’m around my own people I think. It’s badass. In a world when I’m never at ease, it’s good that there are places.

And I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. I see a very bright future for Galloping Ghost… as long as they keep Roadblasters up and running of course… I kid… sort of.

Fuck the Internet

Don’t get me wrong, Youtube is one of the greatest things… well, ever. Millions upon millions of videos for you to enjoy at your leisure for free.

Derrekcomedy is one of those youtube-ish websites with a lot of funny ass shorts on it. But do those funny ass shorts have the ability to be a funny as full length movie.

As it turns out, that’s a big fat no.

Writers and stars, Donald Glover, DC Pierson, Dominic Dierkes portary a very convincing trio of man-children in their senior year, doing what they’ve been doing most of their lives… do lame dectrective shit straight out of Encyclopedia Brown. But now that high school is ending for them, it’s time to be taken seriously. After a neihbor is murdered, they take the case… and failure insues.

This movie has a lot of gem moments in it. Such as the whole strip club sequence… and the foul mouthed little kid. Laughter in short bursts is what Derrickcomedy does best and has for quite a while now. However… there were LONG lapses where I just didn’t laugh. There was nothing much going on. It’s like they just thought of ideas for shorts and decided to lamely conect them with a series of walking shots. This just dosen’t work for a comedy.

When it works it works. But that’s not often enough. I see a bright future for these guys. But not now.


10 Movies That Influence My Writing, and My Life

It’s been really slow on the movies front lately. It’s like everyone is deciding to empty their port-a-johns at once… So I think it’s time for a writing update!

We all have our influences. There’s books, video games of course for me. Yay! I’m a nerd!
But most of all it’s from the movies I watch. Those of you who know, I don’t exactly write anything mainstream. When I broke down the movies that inspire me the most, it was all clear to me.

10. Doubt

Philip Seymor Hoffman was  just born to play a pedo. But more importantly, the scenes in the last hour… the fiery exchanges between him and Meryl Streep are not to be missed. I was even feeling a bit uneasy and awkward when all was said and done and that says something. The film also maintains a dark, mellow tone. Essential for a fucked up story such as this.


9. Singin’ in the Rain
Morning breathWhat’s American cinema at it’s finest and most polished? I’d have to say it’s this. Gene Kelly was truly the master of all things dance. He really reminds me of Jackie Chan. In that he uses all kinds of shit around him just to make what he does better. If you haven’t seen this. Just stop reading and go watch it. I’ll wait.

Moses Supposes…

Now that you’ve seen Singin’ in the Rain, you can see that it’s a movie of one show stopping song after another. The closest thing we have to it now adays is Chicago… Nine never happened. So shut up. Hopefully a musical is in my future.

8. In The Loop

Fuck offAnother thing I love is government commentary. From being in the military, even for such a short time… I can tell you that it’s all disorganized and unprofessional. In The Loop shows us just that, in… in a very foul mouthed way. I felt like I was transported back to the air force.  Some of the best one on one dialog I’ve seen in a long time. I hope to emulate it, even just a bit.

Now fuck off.

7. Idiocracy

Staying in the “it’s so true” realm, is Idiocracy. Luke Wilson gets launched into a future where everyone is dumb as a rock. It’s like he’s living in my world right now… Anyway, again, the dialog is outstanding. Luke Wilson is just an average guy asking average questions, yet he’s smarter than everyone else. Mike Judge creates a very believable but very fucked up world. Again, something I hope to accomplish.

6. The Killer Inside Me

Shoryuken!Part of the writing experience is to wrote so well, you feel the character’s emotions. The Killer Inside me is nothing but raw emotion. I don’t approve of violence towards women, but in this case, it’s pretty damn stunning. With every blow to Jessica Alba’s face your heart sinks lower and lower and lower. Is it gratuitous? Yes. But that’s the point. It’s similar to Saw’s shock value… but much much more real. This is not a movie women will like…  AT ALL. But if you want to know how to write a brutal sex/murder scene, this is the source of that knowledge.

5. Nasty Old People

It’s no secret I’m into indie films. But let’s face the facts. Studio films have taken a huge downturn in the last decade. Same goes for directors and actors. It’s all about making money and not making something you can be totally proud of. Nasty is a prime example on what cool things can be done on a small budget. A talented cast backs up some pretty badass camera work and some cool animation. You don’t need money to make a film, you need heart. And this film has that… and tomatoes being launched out of a window. Sweden’s been churning out good stuff lately

4. Death Becomes Her

Once upon a time Robert Ziminkus actually made GOOD movies like Roger Rabbit and Back to the Future. Death Becomes Her is his most underrated masterpiece (Though it did walk away with an Oscar for Best Visial Effects) it spawned my love for the dark comedy. Everything is hilarious but has a really sad undertone. It keeps up smiling but never really laughing out loud. It’s a feeling I’m still working on how to capture. Nurse Jackie and other shows wouldn’t exsist without this movie and it’s tone.

“You pushed me down the stairs.”

3. Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

I talked about Scott Pilgrim at length before so I’m not gonna do that now. But I can say this movie does everything I want to do as a filmmaker. Huge visuals, a wild story…but NOT DUMB. A mixture of all genres that ends up like a really really really nice smoothie.



2. Natural Born Killers

On of my dreams is to do a movie with Mr. Tarantino. Though he didn’t direct this one, he did write the script and let’s just say it’s very him. I admire him not being a pussy and shit by using racial slurs whenever the hell he seems like it fits. Just like we all do in real life. Not in one spot during this movie did it not just leave your jaw hanging. He knows how to many a totally redonkulus yet believable story. Again. Something I want to achieve.

1. Blind Date

I am a lover of dialog. It’s the most important part of any movie. Without it, you have a dumb action movie. And I pretty much hate raw action movies… but that’s another article. Blind Date pretty much slipped by everyone. More then anything, it’s a series of short films with the same two people pretending to be people they’re not. You get to see the different ranges of the actors and it’s just beautiful. Beautiful and crazy (see: bumper car scene) All leading to a heart wrenching climax when the game can’t be played anymore.

So here’s to me… hopefully I have luck with this writing thing.

The Art of Trolling Part 2: Advanced Trolling

So you’ve read the article on basic trolling. Good for you. You’re very cool. But your journey is far from complete. You must now learn how to troll when the inital trolling is over. This is only for those who want to mentally break down some nerdy faggot over the interwebs because of some petty argument.

But that’s just silly isn’t it? Not really. Some folks just need to be trolled. It’s their reason for existing.

Truly Gangsta

The State of the Fighting Game Community

This kind sir pictured above also had the nerve to because extremely angry and send me a very friendly death threat. But I’m not mad, this is all a part of Advanced Trolling. Like last time. There are 3 easy steps to doing it right.

1. Social Networking

Though sites like Facebook and Myspace have made stalking totally boring, it’s the golden age for trolling. You can talk shit about anybody while not being within arms reach to strangle your dumb ass.

No matter where the trolling started (Interwebs or IRL) nothing really gets the flames of war going quite like sending a private message.

lol spellingThis requires no explaination. But I will anyway.

Whenever you write and angry and threatening message… be sure to make it look like you wrote it in a state of complete rage. That might scare them. Make sure your grammar sucks shit and take advantage of cruise control CAPS LOCK. Be sure to threaten their entire family and mention names, even if you don’t know that person’s family.

After you do this. Be a punk bitch and block them. You punkass bitch.

2. Never talk to that person again directly, even it you didn’t in the first damn place.

That’s correct. Talk all the shit you want after you “Put that nigger in his place.” Even though you really had no communitcation with the individual, you proclaim ultimate victory.

Just look at the pros.

They see me trollin

Hell yeah!

If and when said person tries to talk to you or fight you… just pretend you don’t even know what they’re talking about. YOU WIN.

3. Knock on that nigga’s door.

If you’re still a bitch ass nigga and pissed about something that’s really not serious. Troll this nigga IRL.

That’s right. Just walk right up to that front door. Ring the doorbell and say, “SUP NIGGER”. They may or may not shoot you/call the police/gangrape you. But you got internet cred for standing up for whatever stupid shit you said. It’s all worth it. Just look at OJ Simpson. He turned out okay.

The Art of Trolling Part 1… The Internets

Those of you who know me from around the internets (a series of tubes) knows that I am the foremost autority on trolling. I’m no Dick Cheney of course, but I know my trolling.

Now, you can’t just troll any old way. You gotta do it right. Hit em fast and hard (no homo). I’ll walk you through 4 easy steps to make you a successful troll.

1. Pick your targets.

-It’s really easy to find a mark on an internet forum. If you’re a begining troller, this is where you start. Make sure they’re saying something retarded first.

See below

Now, Nightowl is the trolling party (that’s me!) we had been arguing a little beforehand, and he could have TOTALLY dodged my troll if he hadn’t have written my name. Now, he’s fair game.

2. Poke, Poke, Juggle, Juggle

Now that we have the mark’s attention, it’s all up to you now. I suggest a couple of sarcastic one liners followed by a hilarious picture. Motivational ones get the best responses. And people who respond to trolls tend to be big babies, so you don’t even need to try too hard. But vary your responces and refrain from using “ROFL” or “LOL” Remember… this is the internet. It’s serious.

3. Finish Him

After poking a nigger a few times and used up a couple of forum pages it’s time to bring out the big guns.

-This can come whenever you feel like he’s been trolled enough… or you’ve gotten bored. It’s time to let it fly. Dosen’t matter if what you say is true or not. You just have to piss them off more. Be sure to have a speech in there about something that isn’t relevent. Also be sure to include something that hints you’re a flaming homosexual.

Give them your instant messaging address too and invite them to talk to you. Chances are they’re just a punk bitch anyway so it doesn’t even matter. CONGRATS! You have just trolled a motherfucker! Now to your reward of counselling and cake.

4. Collateral Trolling

If your successful troll is successful, you may have other little girls crying to their mommas as well.

And I wasn’t even trollin that dude. Internet is serious business. But it’s a hard life out there for a troll.

Well, that’s all I have for today. Next time, Trolling IRL.