Bad, but in a good way. Bad Moms Christmas

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Well, last year, Bad Moms came out. It was a fun little movie that was a lot funnier than it really should have been. The tale of three suburban moms trying to take the stick out of their asses and live life. At least that’s what I got from it.

Now, a year later. We have the same group of women getting the stick out of their asses… at Christmas. With the parents coming to visit conveniently at the same time.

Susan Sarandon, Christine Baranski, and Cheryl Hines join the cast this time around as the grandmothers and as you could guess, are all clashing with their children in one way or another.

If you’ve seen any Christmas movie, you’re already seen the one. From the buildup of the anger, to the blowup, to the reconciliation. It’s all standard stuff. You’ll have some really good laughs in there though. They don’t always feel organic, but they’re laughs nonetheless.

And yes, there’s a swath of movie that’s literally a commercial for Jumpzone. They Adam Sandlered a commercial into the movie. But the scenes were funny so it’s okay I guess.

3/5… it’s fun and you should see it after you make the better choice and see Thor. And there’s a sequel coming so you might as well be up to date. It’s not as good as the first. But that’s a rarity these days anyway.

So go see Thor AND this. It’s a good combo.

 

I wanted it to be a good movie. Skiptrace (2016) review.

Jackie Chan.

Okay, you already know it’s going to at least be worth a watch. And Skiptrace is.

But wait, there’s more. You got Jackass’ own Johnny Knoxville in it too? This pretty much guarantees someone’s going to get hurt for no reason.

Yeah, I forgot about this movie too. But I finally got around to watching it.

Jackie Chan plays a cop (surprise) who’s always after this crime boss called “The Matador” and his partner and best friend is killed.

Knoxville plays a conman who witnesses a murder in a Hong Kong casino and ends up being shipped off to Russia by the mob. Yeah, there’s a lot going on here and it’s not really  completely thought out. But we do have WWE’s own Eve Torres with a bad Russian accent.

From there, we find Jackie coming to Johnny’s rescue and the embark on a road trip from Russia to Hong Kong. All the while being chased by both the Russians and the Hong Kong… crime whatever. They learn more and more from one another and find a little common ground.

There’s a twist. It’s actually pretty okay.

But obvious ADR problems and numerous plot holes keep this from being great. Which is a shame because Jackie and Knoxville make a great team. I hope they make another movie together. Hell, I’ll take a sequel to this even.

5/10. This movie could be a lot more fun if the Russians weren’t always randomly showing up. They didn’t even give a valid reason for randomly running into them. But you can also never go wrong with watching Jackie awkwardly fight people.

Cursing, Axes, and MacBook Pros: Fist Fight (2017) Review

We’ve all gotten into a fight after school, sometimes with a bully. And that’s when we truly learned to stick up for our damn selves… or just got our asses beat into the ground like the chickens we were. That’s the concept on the whole film. Standing up for your damn self.

A high school teacher (Charlie Day) is accused of getting his fellow teacher (Ice Cube) fired because he was acting all crazy towards the students. This of course prompts the crazy teacher to challenge him to a fist fight after school. You know, because he’s just that nuts.

This is, at it’s core a remake of the (I guess) classic 3 O’clock high. But instead of the a kid trying to avoid the fight at all costs, we have an adult doing it. That’s where the MacBook Pro comes in. But I don’t wanna spoil anything for you.

When the fight DOES occur, you’ll be treated to one of the best fight sequences I’ve seen in many many many many years. All while the laughs keep coming.

It’s also worth noting that Tracy Morgan is finally back on screen and still hilarious as always. Good to see he’s getting better and hasn’t really lost a step in his time off.

Come for the fist fight. Stay for the Big Sean song. It’s worth the price of a ticket alone.

And as an added bonus, there was a Q&A with Charlie Day and director Richie Keen. Got a picture with Charlie, it’s on my twitter.

But yeah, give this movie your support. They talked about what they would do for a sequel. So please go see this so it’ll happen.

9/10. I came out of it smiling. That’s rare for me these days.

 

 

Is it the Shoes? Kicks (2016) Review

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It’s just like the time I went searching for the perfect DDR shoe.
Except it’s not like that at all.

What we do have is Justin Tipping’s first big foray into the wide world of features (welcome yo).

I’ll keep this spoiler free as always.

The movie follows 15 year old Brandon. He’s not that special a kid. He’s really small and he doesn’t have the nicest shoes. He and his two friends hang out everyday, doing the same thing a lot of us high school kids did. Go to the corner store, smoke, play ball. That shit.

But a chance encounter gets him a pair of red Jordans. Yes, the originals (Being from Chicago, I know them well.) And people start to notice him finally. That is, until he gets robbed by a thug named Flaco and his goons. So after feeling sorry for himself, he decides to go find his shoes and get them back. Setting him on the most epic adventure your average 15 year old can get.

On the way, he learns about what really matters, friends and just doing the right thing. Not continuing the violent cycle.

The film really spoke to me not only because I was a nothing special kind of kid. I’m a nothing special kind of adult to many. We have this greatness inside of us all the time that we know is there. It’s just a matter of getting someone else to see it as well. And that’s what Brandon does, even if he’s not feeling the results of the matter.

At the end of the day, it’s one of the things I like best. Just a modest story, told on a modest budget. That’s where the real human stories are.

Check it out on demand right now. Or you can come to my house and watch it if you want. But I’m kidding, don’t come to my house.

Can’t wait to see how Lowriders comes out, and hire me. Please. lol.

A guy got shot in the head… so… Headshot! I get it! Headshot (2016) Review

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Headshot is is must for those who enjoy the genre of… well, I don’t really know where to throw this one. I really don’t wanna say Kung Fu because this isn’t China. But I don’t want to say “Indonesian Martial Arts Film” because you’ll just have a huge question mark over your head if you’re not in the know. So we’re just gonna call it an “Ass Kicking Film”.

There you go. New genre, “Ass Kicking”.

Because that’s exactly what happens all throughout the movie. The first 20 minutes or so is a little bit slow, with our hero waking up on a beach with amnesia (yes, that again). The nurse, readying Moby Dick at the time gives him the name Ishmael. From there, a gang of thugs keeps trying to kill him and his new girlfriend, the nurse. Who of course gets kidnapped along with a long child. Because you need the small child element to get things extra tense I guess.

This is literally as deep as the storyline really goes. Any more and I’ll spoil the whole damn thing for you. This movie is literally like playing through a Double Dragon game. All fighting no story. But it’s fun as hell.

You’ll recognise star Iko Uwais from The Raid and it’s equally good sequel. He’s here doing what he does best. Kick ass. And he’s under the direction of Timo Tjahjanto (ABC’s of Death) gives us yet another down and really dirty movie. If you saw ABC’s of Death, you know what I mean.

7/10.
I really want to go back and really analyse these fight scenes though. So smoothly edited and pretty damn long.

Don’t come in expecting any sort of a good story. There’s about 3 movies of content packed into a sub-2 hour run time.

It’s currently running at the Chicago International Film Festival as part of the After Dark series. Go check it out this week. If not, I’m sure it’ll be on DVD and stuff at some time soon. This is really a good one to watch with your action movie nerd friends.

Never Giving Up: “Kubo and the Two Strings”

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That’s right, we’re talking movies again… now that we’re making movies again. How about that shit?

But like always, I’ll be quick, and to the point.

Kubo and the Two Strings follows the adventure of Kubo (duh) at 12 year old boy who takes care of his mother who suffers from memory loss due to a brain injury. He goes to the town nearby and tells stories using magic and has two string simissin.

But of course things go south when Kubo’s aunts (who are evil of course) come by to kidnap him and take his other eye.

What begins is a magical quest to find a suit a magical armor that will protect him. From there I can’t really spoil it for you. But here’s a quick thought.

Kubo represents me a little bit. Someone who can do some super cool things. But isn’t quite there yet. Doesn’t know what to do, and is a tad scared. But with a little encouragement, finds his way, as well as a patch to forgiveness and understanding.

Maybe I as looking into the movie a little too much, but it’s just kinda how I feel on the matter.

It’s gonna go down as one of my favorites of the year for sure. Go see it, no one seems to be for some reason. Dunno.

ACEN 2016: I Walked a Lot.

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I’m not a huge Anime person these days to be perfectly honest. But it’s always cool when people come together to share in random shit that they like. That’s the spice of life right there.

I decided hella late to come to ACEN this year where I haven’t been in almost a decade. Like every year it’s in Rosemont over at the Hyatt and pretty much in a food desert. So that 7-11 run over by the Westin (where I stayed, about over a mile away.) really had to count. Shoutouts to Mountain Dew.

I got in at around 4:30. I had to go to Workcon before I hopped the Blue Line and made my way over to the Hyatt where I met Alex and Erik and we all got our badge situation together. Then I had to walk all the way to the Westin where all my gear was. My 50 pounds of camera gear. That a carried around all weekend.

ALL.
WEEKEND.

But anyway, I finally got back around 6, and I went downstairs to see my buddies at Tokyo Attack. They’re still kicking ass and bringing the most badass games with them. They’ve come a long way. I got some personal records on Pump and made many a nerd salty at Pokken. I really like the Pokken set up, they should really have at least one more though and run some tournaments on it. That’s just me talking though.

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The rest of my time there was spent going to a couple of press junkets like with the guy who did the voice of Scorpion in the latest MK titles. The rest of my time was spent and filming a long video project that you’ll see in a few days (I’ll link it here when it’s done.)  Then I entered Pokken where I got Top 16 and the tournament took wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy too long and started late. But that’s just how it goes.

All and all I wasn’t really blown away with the guests and such this time around. It must be an off year or maybe it’s just me. There wasn’t a ton of new info (they couldn’t talk about a lot of stuff, which I understand). But the guests were cool as hell folk.

Overall, despite having to walk back and forth to the hotel a total of 7 times and having issues finding the panel rooms (the map didn’t help a lot). It was actually a decent time. I saw people I had not seen in years and I have a ton of video footage I’m eager to show in a really unique way.

That all said, will I be back next year.

Yes, but in a different capacity. Stay tuned for that one.

 

 

Truly Hardcore

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There’s a time in your life when you just watch a movie and just spend the next few days talking about it. This time, it was Hardcore Henry. There’s really not a ton I can say about it but… I think I can say a few things.

First of all, I went to an early screening with Hank. We were the 2nd people in line and waited about 4 hours. Because we were going to get those seats nice and far back because we weren’t trusting a first person movie right off the bat with our stomachs (saw Captain Phillips in the front row. Never fucking again.) After sitting down and getting some nachos. We were ready to rock.

Hardcore Henry is a first person action movie. It puts you in the shoes of the hero has he throws, shoots, and freeruns all over the place.

 

I’m basically going to stop describing it here, because you can watch the trailer right above and figure everything out from there.

 

The most important thing is this… I didn’t get any motion sickness whatsoever. Maybe it’s because I’ve played FPSes for so long. But there isn’t any more camera shake than the Bourne films so if  you can survive that, you’ll be okay.

 

It’s Hour Thirty runtime seems just right. It gets Henry’s story in and out quickly. But the real star of the movie is Sharlto Copley who wears many hats during this movie (again, trying not to spoil the fun for you.)

 

Basically, what I’m getting at is this… go see it in theaters. It’s best with friends. I was lucky enough to see it in a crowded theater. You’ll whoop and holler throughout the whole thing. It’s fun like that. Shoutout to director Ilya Naishuller for giving me hope that there are original action movies out there. What’s next? A sequel? That could really be fun.

Anyway, go see it before it’s out of theaters.

 

Expect a video when it’s out on Blu Ray where I point out all the references.

C2E2 happened. Twas Cool. Nuff Said.

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And another one of these is over. We got pictures going up on the Facebook page and yadda yadda yadda.

 

But one thing I have to say first off is how great the staff was. The lines were organized goin gin and out, and everyone seemed cool and didn’t have a look of death on there faces. So mad shoutouts to the crew.

 

Secondly, I think they  widened the aisles just a smidgen this year. I could be wrong, but I didn’t have much of an issue getting around.

 

Third of all, good to see video games are back. Hope to see some arcade games soon. Maybe give them just a little more space. They could fit some fun stuff in there.

I couldn’t hit as many panels as I wanted… due to being at work until 3 every day. But I did love it how I parked there at 6am and then took the train to work like the giant nerd I am.

Bottom line. Great con like every year. Just keep on expanding and people are gonna keep coming. It’s gonna be a good bunch of years.

And we may just have a booth next year. Stay tuned.

 

What’s New and What’s Going down.

New day, new year. All the bullshit. But hey, it’s all for the better.

Time has been here for a minute to figure out what to do next. I’m back in Chicago so I have a ton resources at my disposal one again.

But there’s a big problem that I was having. I didn’t really know where I belonged. I have this problem where I’m just not posh enough to hang out with the cool kids. Whether it be film, derby, or fighting games. I just never really fit in. No matter how much I wanted to. But it wasn’t all because they weren’t completely nice (some where actually quite cool) but it’s my problem of wanting to be me and no one else. Anyone who knows me knows that I don’t kiss ass to anyone, don’t care who they are. Nor will I treat anyone differently than anyone else for any reason.

Which leads me to what I’m doing, we’re expanding what we’re doing.

We’re going to be active on Twitch and Youtube again… as well as Soundcloud now, doing various gaming a podcast type things. Got stuff planned, and it’s going to be fun.

On top of that, we’ll be releasing short films more often and maybe a new series or a feature or something. Dunno, we’re taking larger projects by ear. The focus is going to be on small, self contained things for now as the staff builds.

My intention is to build a space where we can all feel more comfortable being ourselves and making the things we want to make without the fear or necessity of having to conform to elements that might not be worth conforming for. No need to be posh, we’re just here to make cool stuff. It’s what makes us happy and fulfilled.

Not surprisingly I’m not alone in my sentiments.

There’s no doubt at all in what I want to do. I want to make stuff that’s fun. Not only for me but for those watching. That’s always the number one priority. However that can be a little difficult sometimes when you’re trying to make something new. It’s not always going to go the way you want it. But the important thing in the long run is to try and do things differently because you never know, you could be on to something.

But that’s where we’re at now. We’ll make some staff announcements soon. Yay. Let’s go.

 

See you guys at C2E2.